International

You're always welcome with us, Catholic Church tells Welby

THE Catholic Church has told the Archbishop of Canterbury as far as they are concerned he has done nothing wrong and is welcome anytime.

We ask you: have you even noticed Ireland has called an election?

ELECTIONS in other English-speaking countries are obviously of great interest to Britons, unless they’re in the country directly next door. Have you noticed?

Trump urges caution as election may have been rigged

PILLAR of democratic integrity Donald Trump has urged his supporters not to get carried away until the veracity of his election has been investigated.

Laughs ahoy as America re-elects popular comedy president

THE world is preparing for a fun-filled four years after the US re-elected the rollicking slapstick clown who proved so hilarious last time.

We get just as excited for your by-elections, America tells UK

US voters has told their British counterparts that by-elections in Wellingborough hold their rapt attention just as much as presidential elections fascinate the UK.

'I ate a squirrel and it was beautiful' says Trump to wild moronic cheers

A BEFUDDLED and deranged Donald Trump has told a rally he ate the most beautiful pet squirrel and been cheered to the rafters for it.

Six offensive American stereotypes proven entirely true by Trump supporters

BRITONS have always sneered at Americans, but if you’ve been following the US election it’s hard not to conclude that some of our nastiest prejudices are dead right. Such as these.

Australian senator mistakes meaningless figurehead for person of power

AN Australian senator has embarrassed herself by shouting slogans at a ceremonial figurehead which could no more do anything than a statue could.

Foreign countries absolutely shit at sending postcards

NATIONS other than Britain cannot so much as convey a simple postcard to its destination without taking months, it has emerged.