Politics

AN average, ordinary working man has admitted that pretty much everyone on his estate has relocated abroad in fear of tomorrow’s budget.

SOME boys like conkers. Others playing rugby or collecting stamps. But I believe that casual racism is a hobby which offers joy to every English schoolboy.

EACH week we meet a couple with a fascinating story about how their romance began. This week: far-right activist Tommy Robinson and home secretary Shabana Mahmood.

THE government has confirmed its new policy on asylum is a little bit vicious, a little bit Denmark and a little bit Nigel Farage’s gonads taken right out of his red trousers.

THE country needs revenue and tax rises are forecast in the coming budget. Who, discounting you obviously, should be targeted?

THE voting public has told Wes Streeting to halt his leadership manoeuvres because ousting Starmer is their job and will be their delight.

AS former breast-expanding hypnotherapist Zach Polanski’s Greens rise in the polls, we examine what political leaders can do for the size, lift and morale of your knockers.

PRESIDENT Trump has threatened to sue the BBC for one billion dollars for saying he did things he actually, provably did. However, he is easily placated.

FOLLOWING a brace of BBC resignations, every other manager in the UK who believed Trump tried to overturn an election is now under pressure to do the same.