Politics

MANAGED to piss off your employees, your opponents and your own party? No problem. Bore them into submission like I do.

THURSDAY’S edition of political panel show Question Time will be broadcast from Angryborough in the county of South Bigotshire.

THE prime minister has informed parliament he cannot answer questions as he is orbiting Earth on the International Space Station for the next 18 months.

THE public has agreed that the thing Keir Starmer had to resign for in February, but did not and which was soon forgotten, must be resigned for again. 

TRUMP has deleted an AI image of himself as Jesus, after belatedly realising there are a few minor differences between himself and the Messiah.

ACROSS the world and Europe, right-wing populists have ascended to power. But now the tide appears to be turning, and all I got out of it was being MP for Clacton?

UP for a scrap with the lefties, and it’s Easter? Willing to leverage chocolate eggs being in shops into a solid reason for an outburst of anti-Muslim prejudice? Here’s how.

HAVE you ditched your significant other in dramatic fashion but now realise you want them back? Win them over with this guide.

THERE feels something a tad amiss about my state visit to the US. Almost as if the prime minister is a back-alley ‘pimp’, and I am to take the role of his ‘bitch’.