Lifestyle

THINK you’re about to embark on a delightful holiday with your lovely family? You aren’t. Here are six ways your kids will f**k it up.

MOST neighbours are a bit strange, but some are absolutely crackers. Here are the surefire signs the folks next door have lost their tiny minds.

GOING on holiday in the UK? Here are five dream destinations people won’t shut up about but which you’ll find deeply underwhelming.

A BRISTOL stoner possesses the uncanny skill of being able to turn any object he encounters into a bong.

ARE you a weird killjoy not bothered about football, even though you’re a woman? Endure the next 72 hours of rolling Lionesses coverage with these tips.

THE biggest fashion faux pas is overthinking what you wear. Here are five sartorial rules only dickheads care about.

GOING on holiday? Need to book somewhere your kids will enjoy but you will find a waking nightmare? Try these destinations.

THINK how easy life would be if you didn’t feel the need to be even slightly tidy. Nikki Hollis, who ‘doesn’t see mess’, explains how to achieve this state of nirvana.

RAISED on the Famous Five’s long summers of sunshine, mouthwatering picnics and foiling a smuggling ring? How did it compare to your miserable reality?

BETTER than everyone else, but still using their grubby tradesmen’s idioms? Indulge in these middle-class rewrites instead.