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Politics

You will be long dead and the sun will explode but then things will get better, promises Starmer

THE prime minister has reassured the public that Britain will be back on track in around five billion years when the sun has become a red giant.

'Do I look like a glass half-full person to you?'

Britain has been naughty, and I've got the austerity strap-on. By Rachel Reeves

YOU love a bit of austerity, don’t you? That’s what you voted for and now you’re going to get it - good and hard. No lube.

Truss: 'I can no longer enjoy salad'

Foreign countries issue travel warning for England due to riots, but also because tourist attractions are shit

Which side will you be on in the civil war that won't happen? A quiz

THE UK is not about to erupt into civil war, but if it did which side would you be on? Find out with this quiz.

'Have you tried going to a dentist?': Classist things you couldn’t help thinking during the riots

AS a good liberal you know you shouldn’t pass judgement on people whose lives you don’t really understand. Sadly you couldn't stop these thoughts popping into your head.

Rioter sure is grateful actions don't have consequences

A RIGHT-WING rioter is feeling very grateful that filming yourself attacking the police and smashing up shops does not incur consequences.

We ask you: which rich pricks who aren’t you should Reeves start taxing?

THE chancellor has admitted she needs to raise taxes, and the electorate is fine with it as long as it only hits other people. Who would you target for revenue?

Tommy Robinson's Flight From Justice: a fun board game for all ages

ARE you a proud police-fighting patriot? Keen to relive your childhood playing Escape From Colditz with a British hero fleeing oppressive forces, but pointedly not the Nazis?