Relationships

Woman who says 'can't complain' then does so for f**king ages

A WOMAN who began a conversation by saying she 'knows she should count her blessings' has gone on to moan for absolutely f**king ages.

Six great ways to avoid having sex with your partner

IN the current circumstances, you might not be feeling that sexy. Or you just might not fancy it, like normal. Either way, here are some great tips to prevent passionate lovemaking.

Single people wondering if they'll ever go on a shit date again

THE nation’s unloved loners have been left wondering if they will get to enjoy a shit date with a weirdo ever again.

Five reasons to thank your lucky f**king stars you're single this Christmas

SAD to be single this Christmas? Here’s why being alone during the festive season is actually f**king brilliant.

Thoughtful present ideas you could have had if you were a better person

AN original and imaginative gift shows a loved one how much you care, but you haven’t taken the time or trouble to choose anything like these.

Seven presents that say 'You're dumped'

CONCERNED about the health of your relationship? If you receive any of these lacklustre gifts you’ll be seeing the New Year in single.

Have your own bed and house: secrets to a lasting marriage

THE strongest marriages can weather any storm, particularly if you only occasionally see each other. Here's how to ensure your marriage lasts.

Kids refuse to do a thing unless there's a café after the thing

Two children have made it clear that a country walk is not acceptable if it does not include a café afterwards.

Man starts argument in vague hope of make-up sex

A MAN has started an argument with his girlfriend in the misguided belief that it could lead to mind-blowing make-up sex.

Man with no idea what to get girlfriend for Christmas just going to propose

A MAN who cannot think of anything to give his girlfriend for Christmas this year has decided to simply propose.