Relationships

AN EX is worried he may have missed his chance to use a global crisis to sneak back into his former partner’s life, he has admitted.

ALL couples have one partner who is obsessively tidy and another who is disgustingly untidy and basically deal with it, researchers have found.

A MARRIED couple have been carefully avoiding sexual intercourse for months despite not being told to do so.

DO you normally stop the awkwardness of a first date by getting drunk and having sex? Here’s how to cope now that’s not allowed.

THE government has issued clarification who is allowed to have sex with who, where, and when.

DOES your partner stare into the distance and say they’re fine, but in a worrying way? Here are five things that could be causing it. 

A WOMAN is fearing for her mental health after becoming trapped in a suburban house with a massive Queen fan she married in 2008.

A MAN has realised that only the crap friends he never talks to anyway live near enough to visit safely.

A WOMAN has realised that she spends most evenings eagerly waiting for her partner to fall asleep so she can start doing what she actually wants to do.

A COUPLE who were secretly relieved that their September wedding would probably have to be postponed are now terrified they might have to go through with it.