International

THE UK has drawn up a formal agreement to receive sovereignty over the Chagos Islands in return for giving Mauritius Piddington.

A US president’s suggestion that Ireland should reunify as soon as possible would have triggered riots, terrorism and political crisis if he were not a shite-spouting halfwit.

DONALD Trump has offered the public various recollections of his actions on September 11th, 2001. Finally he lays out his full timeline for the day.

TRUMP has discovered he can change names of places and annoy people. New Mexico is next, because of his racism, but any of these could follow.

A FAR-RIGHT win in the Saxony-Anhalt region has the world asking when Germany will learn its f**king lesson.

ARGENTINA has been warned that if it ever does get its hands on the Falkland Islands it will wonder why it bothered.