Environment

TORY fears of a brutal fox insurgency are growing  after one of them was spotted trying to ride a horse.

THE ruptured oil pipe in the Gulf of Mexico has been capped just minutes before everyone realised it had all been their fault.

SUPERFLUOUS wildlife is still hampering vital progress in the logging and fast food industries, it was claimed last night.

AFTER five days of disciplined self-control Britain finally gave in last night and blamed the Met Office for volcanoes.

GLOBAL warming is probably being caused by ghosts, climate scientists claimed last night.

BEAVERS are to be renamed 'riverdogs' after zoologists finally conceded defeat to the overwhelming forces of sexual innuendo.

THE government's latest green motoring campaign is urging drivers to switch off their engines and get wedged under a massive lorry.

THE Nissan factory in Sunderland is to produce a new electric car that will be unable to get as far as Doncaster.

SHOPPERS are being offered the chance to use ethical purchases to 'offset' acts of unspeakable foulness.

THE Arctic Circle is on course to be really quite lovely by 2019, new research has confirmed.