Environment

FISH have spoken out against the widely-held supposition that they are weird. 

AN ADORABLE cat turns into a sadistic psychopath the second she leaves the house, it has been revealed.

A CAT and a mouse are engaged in what can only be described as a lethal game of cat and mouse.

SIGHTINGS of a fairly big cat have been reported by local residents in Somerset.

THE UK has told spring that it is nice to see it but after its betrayals they can never truly love it again. 

A WOMAN who has never re-used a carrier bag in her entire life has once again told the cashier she must have left them in the car.

WINTER has entered its 18th consecutive fucking month, the Met Office has confirmed.

CATS have confirmed all their loud annoying fights will take place in the early hours of the morning.

SQUIRRELS are all on cocaine, it has emerged.

CHILDREN are only interested in going outdoors when it is incredibly cold, it has emerged.