NOBODY is admitting that the awful weather we wanted but is turning out to be a huge pain in the arse is the perfect metaphor for Brexit, it has been confirmed.
Despite the obvious parallels between wishing for something different and then realising that the thing you wished for is a steaming pile of shit, no-one is making that comparison.
Brexiter Wayne Hayes said: “I thought I wanted it to rain because the weather had been so hot for so long, but now it’s here I remembered that actually, rain is rubbish.
“I can’t think of any other time in my life anything similar has happened.”
Prime Minister Theresa May said: “Even though all my shoes are soaking and my clothes stink of damp, these grey skies are actually a very exciting thing for Britain.
“I am going to go and negotiate with the clouds for it to stop raining, it should only take about five years.”