Politics

PEOPLE just become confused and upset if they rise above their existing social class, the government has claimed.

BREXIT secretary David Davis has happily paid over £50 million to cancel his contract at Fitness First.

JACOB Rees-Mogg perused lithographs showing the bare ankles of Victorian strumpets in his constituency office, it has been claimed.

THE nation has reluctantly come to the defence of Theresa May after she was attacked for totally unfair reasons for once.

BREXIT minister David Davis has proudly told Britain that after six months of tough negotiating he has given in to every single one of the EU’s demands. 

PRESIDENT Trump’s latest racial slur is part of a White House strategy to make his offensive comments more accessible to the whole family.

SOCIAL media 'distorts' the truth, according to a man who duped millions of people with a big red bus covered in deliberate lies.

You people magically pluck banknotes from the air to drink solidly from six till midnight. You're walking bloody economic miracles.

THE government has promised £3 billion in funding for Brexit, a further £6 billion for bullshit, and an unprecedented £12 billion for utter fucking bollocks.

PHILIP Hammond has revealed that his Budget is just a picture of a skull and crossbones.