Work

THERE’s nothing worse than sitting peacefully on the bog when a colleague walks in. Here’s how to discover who the selfish, entitled bastard is.

A MANAGER giving a presentation to 20 bored employees is under the misguided impression he is delivering a dazzling TED talk.

EMPLOYERS have confirmed they only consider giving the top roles to candidates with top grades in their religious studies GCSEs.

A WOMAN who has been absent on medical leave has return to the office with, to her co-workers’ surprise, significantly larger breasts.

HUMAN resources want to fully exploit their humans as a resource and for them to be happy about it. These are the contradictory messages you will get this week.

BEING told off in a constructive and professional manner by a manager who only wants to help is far worse than a red-faced bollocking, workers have agreed.

A CORPORATE worker is beginning to realise that her lanyard wields no power in the outside world.

A WOMAN has asked her middle-aged son if he has considered becoming a barrister, with cancer research scientist or Oxford professor as back-up options.

WAVING a baton about looks easy, doesn’t it? And you’re right, it is. Here are some jobs that are, quite frankly, taking the piss.

AN unemployed man is way ahead of warnings that AI will end traditional paid work, he feels.