Science & Technology

BRITAIN’S insecure, attention-seeking climate has been told to get a grip.

THE prime minister has announced that £1.1 billion is to be spent creating a major British superhero.

EIGHTEEN workers have died after a USB stick was removed from a computer without adequate precautions.

CHIMP researchers have discovered a lexicon of 66 gestures, 54 of which are jokes at the expense of Sir David Attenborough.

GOVERNMENT agencies have been advised that 98% of internet traffic is breasts and shopping.

FLIES have admitted the universe contains a substance which light can pass through but they cannot.

THESE are the stories that the rich and powerful don't want you to be able to find.

THE yoghurt industry must start making antibiotic yoghurts or everyone will die, experts have claimed.

A CHUPA Chups lolly has defeated all attempts to remove its plastic wrapping.

A NEW sixteen-thousand character acronym encapsulates all conceivable reactions to anything seen on the internet.