Science & Technology

'How to get Oasis tickets or are they shit': The top Google searches of 2024

GOOGLE has released the UK’s most frequent search terms of 2024, no, not the porn ones. The results will surprise and depress everyone.

The sad bastard's guide to using entirely inappropriate websites to try and pull women

IS a woman under the age of 55 asking for plumber recommendations on Nextdoor? Or flirtatiously adding career goals on LinkedIn? You should definitely make a move. Here’s how.

Best Shouty Blonde Moron: The TikTok Awards 2024 categories

THE first UK and Ireland TikTok Awards are here, and what a feast of quality they promise to be. These are the categories.

They only go as fast as a milk float: Seven things gammons firmly believe about EVs

CONSUMERS are rejecting electric cars for a variety of reasons, but it’s great news for right-wing blokes who’ve always hated these effeminate vehicles. Here Roy Hobbs explains why you shouldn’t buy one.

Five fair, reasonable punishments for people who use their phones in the cinema

NO reprisal is too extreme for the subhuman scum who use their bright phones in dark cinemas. Even these punishments are entirely reasonable.

'Thank you for being you' means he's ejaculated: your Reply Guy's messages, decrypted

YOUR online Reply Guy, faithfully leaving a comment under every Instagram post, is always there for you. But what do his messages really mean?

Internet definitely to blame for this but nobody sure quite how

THE re-election of Trump is definitely the internet’s fault in a way that has yet to be specified, everyone has agreed.

Loving text from dad obviously a scam

A WARM, loving message from a father is clearly a scam designed to trick his son out of money.