Health

DO you worry about having to deal with an emergency during the ambulance strike later this month? Luckily films and TV contain all the medical advice you need.

A MAN in his 40s has found he now needs to limber up with some gentle exercise before bed to avoid strains and injuries.

THE NHS is so good under the Tories that people can’t wait to go into hospital. That means there might be a wait for a ride in an ambulance. Here are some fun ways to fill the time.

SO nurses are going on strike. Well so am I. While they’re being leftie troublemakers I won’t be fantasising about their tight, sexy uniforms with stockings and suspenders underneath.

THE British have decided that if the cost of preventing the complete collapse of the NHS is a load of foreigners coming over, we should just bin it.

GOING to the gym puts a perilous strain on your heart and muscles. These are the health benefits of just thinking about exercising.

IS your home cosy, warm and winterproofed? Or does it suffer from draughts, damp patches and being in the UK?

HAS the moment finally come? To sort your shit out and find the new, better you? Will it last until Thursday?

A WOMAN’S method of centering and looking after her mental wellbeing is laying into her friends and family, she has confirmed.

AS the new health minister for you people, I thought it would be a good idea to outline how you can buck up your ideas and get healthy the Tory way. It worked for me!