Health

Five ways to prove you're more sleep-deprived than your partner

AFTER a few sleepless nights, there’s nothing more annoying than your partner thinking she’s more sleep-deprived than you. It’s not a competition, but here’s how to prove she’s definitely wrong and you’ve won.

Low pay, rocketing training costs and a pandemic: nine things that are nothing to do with the NHS staffing crisis

THE NHS staffing crisis is the worst ever and has no connection whatsoever with any of these issues.

Mail reader now sceptical about drinking water

A DAILY Mail reader is unconvinced by the supposed benefits of drinking water in a heatwave.

Dogs announce plan to not move at all

THE nation’s dogs have unveiled their plan to get through this heatwave by not moving from one spot throughout.

Man has early night to make head start on anxiety checklist

A MAN has started going to bed earlier so he has more time to run through the ever-expanding list of things he needs to worry about.

How to think you're dieting, by a man

CONSIDERING half-heartedly trying to lose weight? Allow a man to give you tips to ensure you never really commit.

Key component of slimming Mediterranean diet is chain-smoking

THE crucial element of the southern European diet that keeps natives so attractively thin is not olive oil or leafy vegetables but endless cigarettes.

Eye of the Tiger: The songs every prick has on their running playlist

WANT to motivate yourself to achieve some minor fitness goal? Download these tracks and imagine you’re at Olympian levels of fitness and not another decrepit jogger gasping for air.

Enjoy getting f**king polio, anti-vaxxers told

WITH the UK experiencing its first polio outbreak in 40 years, people are eager to see anti-vaxxers put their money where their mouth is.

Man horrified to realise he's as old as his parents when they were really f**king ancient

A MAN is facing up to the horrific realisation that he is now the same age his parents were when they seemed alarmingly old.