Celebrity

SIR Richard Branson has revealed he lives most of the year on his private island because it is exactly that.

RADIOHEAD singer Thom Yorke is visiting the world's remotest places to warn their inhabitants about Spotify.

NOBEL Prize recipient Peter Higgs has spent his prize money on a customised lilac sports utility vehicle.

THREE-YEAR-OLD iguana Nikki Hollis has been named sexiest lizard alive by men's magazine Esquire.

ACTRESS Mia Farrow has claimed she mysteriously fell pregnant during a ritual by a secret sect of easy listening fanatics.

THE prime minister's wife has halted divorce proceedings after realising she'd lose a sweet £200-a-year tax break.

RICHARD Dawkins's autobiography controversially omits his creation by lightning on the slopes of Mount Olympus.

PRINCESS Diana's hair looked really weird, it has been claimed.

PRINCE William is to quit the armed forces and become a full-time public relations consultant.

MILEY Cyrus's tongue will soon be three times longer than her body, experts have warned.