THE big beasts of the Conservative party have been driven out and replaced with a big twat with four whole seats, it has emerged.
Last night saw previously powerful politicians unseated to be replaced in the right-wing media’s affections by the UK’s premier name in pint-guzzling twattery, Nigel Farage.
Donna Sheridan from Exeter said: “I guess even new dawns of democracy come with openly racist, immigrant-hating linings.
“Is one super-sized twat better or worse than a herd of twats of slightly lower calibre? Does his being in parliament make much difference to his decades of small-screen dominance? Is it cosmic balance because we lost George Galloway?”
Ryan Whittaker of Wrexham said: “I liked all my little Portillo moments, and I’m looking forward to about five days time when it finally sinks in for Truss, but I had my fingers crossed for more.
“It’s hard to feel overjoyed when the grim spectre of Jeremy Hunt still lingers over the country and then there’s Farage. We’ve exchanged the big beasts for the Godzilla of twats.”
The leader of Reform UK, previously the Brexit Party, previously UKIP, briefly but not officially the Anti-Vax and Lockdown Party, said: “There’s four of us like the Beatles, and they conquered the world.”
