Society

HIPPY parents will be giving their children drab, joyless dairy-free Easter eggs again this year, it has been confirmed.

BRITONS are currently either away or brimming with resentment, it has emerged.

TAPAS-TYPE meals are proof that the concept of sharing is overrated, it has been claimed.

CREATING an aspirational street food brand is one of a series of new scouting badges, it has been confirmed.

BRITONS who prefer weekends without expensive social obligations have opposed gay and straight marriage.

A MAN who looks like he travelled here in a brass time machine actually works in marketing, it has been confirmed.

INFANTS cry at night because they are little bastards, according to new research.

ANYONE who owns a pet snake is secretly begging for someone to stop them, psychologists have agreed.

HOME improvement enthusiasts are not doing anything that worthwhile, it has been claimed.

WATCHING television drama is more mind-expanding than reading contemporary fiction, it has been claimed.