Society

A MAN has confirmed that mindfulness has helped him calmly acknowledge and accept his own twattishness.

A 33 YEAR-OLD woman has admitted she has not learned anything new about herself for at least seven years.

BRITAIN has pledged to do all it can to help the country’s hard hit buy-to-let landlords.

A MAN who closed his Facebook account in August 2015 apparently no longer exists.

A MAN sitting in a cafe without looking at any sort of screen has been condemned as a freakish misfit.

LIBRARIES are never going to make money if they dish out books for free, the government has claimed.

MODERN fathers are just as capable as mothers at getting tediously over-emotional about their babies, they have announced.

UMBRELLA users have announced that everyone else must get out of their way.

A NORTHERNER is convinced that everyone from Southern England is upper class.

BRITAIN’S getting-up time has been altered to prevent the workforce from becoming too happy.