Society

A BRITISH patriot is worried that the five pound note featuring Winston Churchill is too obscure for its target audience.

A STUDENT having a post-wank piece of toast has realised his existence could not be less like clothes company Jack Wills’ depiction of university life.

THE parents of a 45-year-old vegetarian woman are confident that she will soon start eating meat again.

‘CHEESE rolling’ participants in Gloucestershire are furious after discovering that cheese can simply be purchased from a shop.

A STAIR gate has proved to be a successful barrier to a baby, a pet dog and a grandmother.

A WOMAN has been ejected from a bar for not caring about the 400 different brands of gin on offer.

A MIDLANDS woman has outraged friends and neighbours by having a barbecue without any man being in attendance.

A MAN is concerned that his girlfriend’s best friend has stopped liking his status updates on Facebook.

A FAMILY that appears ready for an outdoor weekend is actually going to spend it at an out-of-town entertainment complex, it has been confirmed.

FOUR in five couples would like to end their co-dependent relationship with another couple, it has emerged.