Society

A WOMAN who has not cracked a smile at any point during a text exchange has nonetheless claimed that she is ‘laughing out loud’.

BRITAIN is solemnly remembering September 8th last year, the date when all television programming abruptly and without warning stopped.

A MAN has derided the idiotically woke idea of ‘safe spaces’ from an extremely safe location in his Cotswolds home.

A MAN telling his son how escaped prisoners were not long ago regarded as folk heroes is realising how deeply strange that was.

THE UK is delighted that Birmingham is bankrupt because it means they get to clear the place out and start again.

SHOPS in the UK have added safety helmets and steel toe cap shoes to their ‘back to school’ ranges alongside lunch boxes and protractor sets.

HEY, fresh meat. Yeah I’m talking to you. About to start your first five-stretch in the learning slammer? Here’s how to get through it.

THE friends of a millennial who has only had two holidays, two city breaks and a trip to a Spanish music festival this year are considering an intervention.

A WOMAN is less than thrilled to be shackled to an unwanted piece of tat for the rest of her life because it has her name on it.

RIDING the bus is miserable, but you can keep yourself entertained by proving how superior you are to all the other passengers by following these tips.