Science & Technology

A FLAWLESS cup of tea has made further tea-making redundant, it has been claimed.

THE abandoned, broken ruins of 1990s internet sites are popular destinations for tourists unable to believe that people once lived there.

NOBODY knows what the flavour of Irn-Bru is supposed to be, it has emerged.

THE last two people who listen to the music of Kula Shaker are undergoing enforced breeding to prevent the extinction of their kind.

A NASA space probe has been launched to find Earth-like planets who can lend us money.

THE public has expressed total approval for genetically altered babies that do not need to shit.

LONDON'S Natural History Museum will remove a fat-shaming dinosaur exhibit, it has confirmed.

A JURASSIC Park-style clone of Winston Churchill has made Britons realise that the WW2 prime minister may have been an arse.

MONDAY January 19th was officially the most depressing day of the year, according to scientists degrading themselves by concocting media bullshit.

A PETRI dish has become the centre of attention after developing a new strain of thymosin-derived ACT1 peptide.