International

EXPERTS have stressed that of course America is genuinely stupid enough to elect a deranged murder clown as its president.

DONALD Trump is furious after discovering that women can vote in elections.

PEOPLE around the world are deciding how to spend their last day before Donald Trump becomes US President.

THE refugee camp in Calais has already become luxury apartments that only footballers and bankers can afford.

A COACH packed with British children has arrived in Calais, where they are being right little bastards.

MILLIONS of Britons are surprised at how few seven-year-old refugees have journeyed alone across the whole of Europe.

THE undead have pledged their support for Donald Trump in the US presidential election.

ITALY has bowed to the superior knowledge of Britons and admitted its signature meat sauce should be pronounced ‘bo-log-nays’.

DISHONEST EU leaders have been attacked for telling Britain that it is going to get exactly what it wanted.

HILLARY Clinton remained on course for the White House despite an unconvincing debate victory over a crazed baboon.