International

You could have just emailed, says EU

EU LEADERS are puzzled about why Britain wrote them a letter in the age of electronic communication.

People indifferent to important things passionately defend leggings

PEOPLE who are generally not that engaged with world events have stepped up to defend stretchy jogging bottoms.

But this is a MacBook, says air passenger

A PASSENGER on a Jeddah-London flight has explained that while laptops may be banned he has a MacBook, which is different.

He spouts exactly the same bollocks in private, GCHQ confirms

GCHQ HAS confirmed that Donald Trump’s private communications are nothing but the same meaningless bollocks he says in public.

Theresa May in absolutely massive wild guess about Scottish people

THERESA May is betting the future of the UK on a gigantic wild guess about how Scottish people react to things.

Be a good little country and try some Brexit, May tells Scotland

THERESA May has told Scotland that if they just gave the Brexit a proper try they would absolutely love it.

Man admits breaking into family's home to do BBC Skype interview

A MAN whose BBC interview was interrupted by a family has admitted breaking into their house to use their broadband.

Northern Ireland briefly noticed

BRITAIN has briefly noticed Northern Ireland before returning its attention to other things.

Trump claims Obama has been following him around since 1987

DONALD Trump has claimed Barack Obama has been stalking him for the last three decades.

US fears Trump may discover emojis

AMERICA fears it may just be a matter of time before President Trump discovers the emoji keyboard on his phone.