US voters has told their British counterparts that by-elections in Wellingborough hold their rapt attention just as much as presidential elections fascinate the UK.
With headlines dominated by an election that Britons have no say in, Americans have reassured them that they go through a similar media frenzy whenever the likes of Rochdale or Batley and Spen go to the polls.
Martin Bishop of Little Rock, Arkansas, said: “I feel your pain. When Christopher Skidmore resigned in January, we could only look on powerlessly as the beacon of the free world, Kingswood, hung in the balance.
“Fox News was bludgeoning us with updates around the clock. Elon Musk was busily spreading misinformation about Labour candidate Damien Egan on X. We pored over every fresh poll. I lost a bet that night, and now I have a Professor John Curtice tattoo.”
New Yorker Nikki Hollis added: “UK by-elections are bigger than the Super Bowl around here. My buddies and I are up all night, watching BBC News 24, doing shots and whooping every time we see tired poll clerks wearily tabulating ballot papers.
“The only thing more electrifying than watching West Lancashire or Tamworth battle it out are the Police and Crime Commissioner elections. They bring Time Square to a standstill like the last episode of Seinfeld.”
Julian Cook of Croydon said: “Oh good. Because my office considers my Kamala obsession makes me some kind of impotent, doom-mongering freak.”
