Environment
Jesus Christ get it off my face, says scientist
THE scientist who discovered a new ferret-like mammal is pleading with colleagues to somehow get it off his face.
Shitloads of pandas everywhere by 2084
GIANT pandas will become a common pest in the UK as they breed uncontrollably, it has emerged.
Men die of horniness in one-day heatwave
YESTERDAY'S 24-hour heatwave has claimed the lives of nine men who were overwhelmed by sex thoughts.
That flower was gagging for it, says bee
A BEE has described giving a good-looking purple flower the pollinating of its life.
Dolphins slag each other off
DOLPHINS have been observed displaying two-faced behaviour.
Birth of royal baby pushes human population beyond sustainability
THE royal birth represents the population 'tipping point' beyond which the planet cannot sustain human life.
Just what the hell do you people want? asks sun
THE sun has expressed bafflement at Britain's reaction to it shining for a few days.
