Business

Interns gaining valuable going-out-to-get-lollies experience

INTERNS in high-flying businesses across the country are earning crucial on-the-job experience of being sent out to get Soleros.

Every office has one person who is not a dick

THERE is only one person who is okay in any office, it has been claimed.

Every member of smiling Pizza Express team considering job options

EVERY member of the dedicated team launching a new Pizza Express is looking for alternative work, it has emerged.

Windows was just a ‘nasty trick’ all along, says Gates

THE entire Windows operating system has been a vindictive practical joke since its inception, Bill Gates has admitted.

Swearing no longer counts toward character limit, confirms Twitter

OBSCENE language will not be considered part of Twitter’s 140-character limit, it has been revealed.

Entire office seems to be doing some sort of roleplay

EVERYONE in an office appears to be playing out a cliched role in a slightly over-dramatic way, a new employee has noticed.

Holiday handover note just thinly veiled list of grievances

AN OFFICE worker's holiday handover email is just a passive aggressive list of reasons she hates her job, it has been revealed.

Male receptionist sent home for not wearing codpiece

A RECEPTIONIST at a leading City firm has been sent home without pay for refusing to wear a jewelled leather codpiece.

Can you put all this in an email for me? asks manager who doesn't know what else to say

A MANAGER has asked one of her team to ‘put all this in an email’ because she could not think of anything else to say.

Money environmentalists defend tax havens

CASHOLOGISTS have argued that tax havens offer the last unspoiled refuge for untamed profits.