Arts & Entertainment

Six shite albums you paid £10.99 for because of one decent song

THE history of popular music is littered with platinum albums that were largely filler. You bought these and wished you’d waited for the greatest hits.

Love Island contestants horrified by entrant with unbleached anus

A MAN whose rear end has never been anything other than vigorously washed has been allowed to enter Love Island, to the horror of other contestants.

Mantra of the Cosmos, and other supergroups formed to destroy their members' legacies

A GALLAGHER brother and Shaun Ryder are teaming up to triangulate monetisation of their fanbases. These supergroups were failures from their first moments.

Five ways to drive yourself up the f**king wall looking up a song

GOT a song in your head but can’t remember anything concrete about it? Here’s how to drive yourself insane while trying to find it.

Brat vs Dark Side of the Moon: The dad's guide to totally unfair album comparisons

THE bestselling albums of 2024 have been announced, and they prove today’s music is rubbish compared to what dads listened to in their youth. Let’s compare totally different things.

Sex on Fire, and other songs so terrible they overshadow anything good the artist ever achieved

IT only takes one appalling song to undermine a musical legacy. Here are the tunes that ruined everything for the talented idiots who wrote them.  

Sophie Ellis-Bextor's guide to doing karaoke at your local pub

HORRIBLE people have criticised Sophie Ellis-Bextor’s New Year’s Eve BBC show. However the singer feels it was a performance worthy of any pub karaoke night. Here are her tips.

Mum forcing family to watch old, shit film

A MOTHER is selfishly forcing her entire family to watch a film that was made before 1990 and is therefore a slow, cheap, boring torture.

How to join the National Richard Osman Crappy Christmas Book Opt-out Register

KEEN to avoid being gifted the latest mediocre book by a TV celebrity abusing their fame by way of the written word? Complete the following form and email to the Home Office:.