Sport

Spain show boring inability to be rubbish

EURO 2012 winners Spain have come under more fire for showing a reluctance to mix things up by being bad at football.

Rangers becomes a pub team

SCOTTISH football chiefs are forcing Rangers to start again as a pub team following their financial difficulties.

French teach English meaning of 'ennui'

ENGLAND’S opening Euro 2012 game against France has taught fans what cheroot­-smoking philosophers have been going on about all these years.

Joey Barton 'based personality on Swayze in Road House'

FOOTBALLER Joey Barton has confessed to stealing his philosophising tough guy persona from the lead character in the 1989 movie Road House.

Boat Race kills 27

THE 158th Varsity Boat Race between Oxford and Cambridge ended in a shootout which killed nine participants and 18 spectators.

Car salesman hot favourite to be drunkest person at Cheltenham

A 38-YEAR-OLD car salesman is the bookies' choice for Champion Drinker at the Cheltenham Festival.

Liverpool bring back the lack of romance of the cup

LIVERPOOL has once again made the League Cup Final look like the end of a damaging relationship.

Pearce selects a blend of hopeless and not good enough

CARETAKER England manager Stuart Pearce has picked a squad containing an unexpected variety of rubbish.  

Warren to launch pay-per-view press conferences

FRANK Warren is to charge home audiences £12 for all future boxing interviews.

Villas-Boas issues confident statement from Portakabin

CHELSEA manager Andre Villas-Boas has remained defiantly upbeat despite having his office moved into a modular building several miles from Stamford Bridge.