Politics

BREXITERS have been asked for an update on Britain’s amazing trade deal with America now that Donald Trump is likely to lose.

SNEAKY Democrats are trying to sabotage this election by placing more votes for their candidate than us Republicans. Let me explain why that undermines democracy while I disrupt ballot counting.

BORIS Johnson has a spring in his step this morning after seeing US voters vote for a lying bastard with nonsense hair in massive numbers.

POLITICS has become so polarised that it’s impossible to admit that you wouldn’t mind giving Dominic Raab one. Form a cross-party coalition with these five...

NIGEL Farage is making an electoral comeback with a party dedicated to finally making him f**k off permanently.

EVER found yourself trapped in an intolerable situation you can’t back out of? Faking your own death begins to seem like the answer.

DOMINIC Cummings has announced the dates of his forthcoming four-week Lockdown 2 tour of the UK.

LABOUR is in turmoil over its handling of antisemitism. Here Tory minister Norman Steele explains how his party is completely free of racism and welcomes people of a funny colour.

A SUPPORTER of Jeremy Corbyn firmly believes he can bounce back from losing the 2019 election, resigning as leader and being suspended from the party yesterday. 

I THOUGHT it would be easy. Marry rich bloated pig man, have quiet life as scowling clothes hanger, wait to outlive him, then have a lovely time as wizened twiglet in killer heels.