ARE you studying for a GCSE in Trussonomics? Here’s a handy revision guide complete with a range of exam questions to practise on.
Trussonomics is a form of economics based on ignoring all established facts and ploughing ahead with batshit policies you don’t understand. Check you’ve mastered all the key areas of this fascinating subject with the questions below.
Under Trussonomics, what is the most fundamental economic principle?
A) Supply and demand.
B) Passing off idiotic tax cuts as necessary because of Putin, or something.
What should a modern economy be investing in?
A) High-tech because we can’t compete on labour costs with the Far East.
B) Cheese. It’s the growth industry of the 21st century because it’s so versatile. You can put it in a sandwich, melt it under the grill, or build houses from it because it’s waterproof.
Kwasi Kwarteng’s tax cuts immediately damaged the pound, the availability of mortgages and the value of pensions. What conclusion should you draw?
A) Tax cuts are damaging the economy.
B) There haven’t been enough tax cuts so we need more.
Who is a good source of economic advice?
A) The father of modern macroeconomics John Maynard Keynes, or a respected contemporary economist such as Simon Wren-Lewis.
B) Weird libertarian thinktanks who worship Ayn Rand despite not being 17, irrationally hate the NHS to a psychopathic degree, and think it’s perfectly feasible to privatise air if everyone agrees to wear a face mask with a meter on it.
Explain trickle-down economics.
A) A discredited theory popular with rich Reaganites who, unsurprisingly, liked tax cuts.
B) A totally brilliant thing where you give loads of money to rich people. They never put it in the bank or just buy niche products like caviar, so it ‘trickles down’ to everyone. There’s no evidence it works, but they said bumble bees can’t fly so it must.
How can you tell if Trussonomics is working?
A) Increased GDP, and by studying indicators like greater life expectancy.
B) Living standards are worse than the Dark Ages, the UK is a polluted wasteland full of abandoned fracking rigs, and Liz Truss is prime minister.
Now check how effective your revision has been.
Mostly As. Sorry, but you are likely to fail. Go back and refresh yourself with basic principles of Trussonomics, eg. ‘Do whatever the free market loonies at the Institute of Economic Affairs tell you.’
Mostly Bs. You’re an expert on Trussonomics and your exams will be a mere formality. Unless the economy is so f**ked you’re too busy scavenging berries and beetles just to stay alive, which is looking increasingly likely.
