A BUILDER who has caused £8,000 of damage to the kitchen he is supposedly improving has promised he will see the job through.
Inspired by Theresa May, Norman Steele has heroically decided to bodge his way through despite not knowing what he is doing and breaking the ceramic hob this morning.
Homeowner Mary Fisher said: “At this stage we just want the whole thing to stop. But he won’t leave.
“At first Norman seemed like a safe pair of hands, boring but reliable. But gradually it became clear he’d never done anything like this before and was too pig-headed to listen to a word of advice.
“Now there are wires hanging out the wall, the cupboard doors are all at funny angles and he’s somehow managed to knacker our lovely new Bosch dishwasher.
“We’d sack him, but every other builder round here’s either worse or has suddenly retired.”
Steele said: “Yes, a load of plaster has just fallen off unexpectedly, but how am I meant to do a decent job if everyone keeps ‘talking down’ my construction abilities?
“I’ll see it through. Luckily for Mrs Fisher I’m not a quitter.”