Society

A RECORD number of students are to study subjects they just found out existed.

HUNDREDS of Britons have made the annual trip to Saudi Arabia to show off their average cars.

ALL owners of babies or kittens are convinced they would be perfect for lucrative advertising work.

TRUST fund recipients think it is normal to have large amounts of free money.

31-YEAR-OLD strip club visitor Wayne Hayes has condemned the other men there as perverts.

IT would not be a big a deal if Plymouth was destroyed in a nuclear explosion, according to the government.

PEOPLE ordering smaller glasses of beer have demanded an end to being ridiculed.

STUDENTS getting exam results have been reassured that even if they did less well than hoped, the whole thing is a load of bollocks.

THE police are to receive training in how to get on with solving crimes rather than just f*cking things up.

NOT socialising is preferable to hanging out with annoying people, it has been claimed.