THE third little pig has been left homeless after his house, built with RAAC concrete instead of bricks, was destroyed in a single blow.
The pig, one of three neighbours, was advised by architects that aerated concrete would last a good 30 years and chose to use the low-cost material instead of bricks to save on local authority budgets.
Pig Tom Booker said: “The PFI contract said that concrete full of holes would never let me down. It promised the holes made it extra strong, and it wouldn’t be like the asbestos panels and polyethylene cladding.
“I was sitting pretty, or so I thought. Until I heard an ominous crack and the roof collapsed and I’m picking bits of chimney out of my crotch.”
Neighbour Norman Steele, also a pig, said: “I was offered aerated concrete but went with straw. If it’s good enough for Grand Designs, it’s good enough for me.
“Next door went with sticks, a very underrated construction material, and it’s still standing. Meanwhile the aerated concrete house is closed pending safety checks and the poor occupant’s in temporary accommodation.”
Mr BB Wolf said: “Christ, all I was doing was stress testing it.”
