A FATHER has been silent for almost a week, either in tribute to Britain’s soldiers or because he is in one of his moods.
Bill McKay, from Portsmouth, stopped speaking around 10 o’clock on Wednesday evening and has since maintained a silence that is either solemn or slightly hostile.
His wordlessness has been broken by the occasional harrumph while reading the newspaper, and a weary sigh while watering the houseplants.
McKay’s daughter Lucy said: “Dad always wears a poppy and loves The Dam Busters, so he probably thought a mere two minutes’ silence was insufficiently respectful.
“Perhaps he has decided to become a monk in memory of our brave boys, and will shortly be donning poppy-coloured robes and converting the shed into a mini-Cenotaph.
“However this does also coincide with mum repeatedly telling him it’s our turn to have nan for Christmas this year.”
She added: “Last time this happened was when mum wanted to turn the shed into a ‘guest room’ so that her sister could come and stay.
“He spent most of that month communicating exclusively in snorts and grunts, and only snapped out of it when Where Eagles Dare came on Netflix.”