Science & Technology

SCIENTISTS have been asked to confirm that they definitely said they could make brainguns and if so, when.

RIGHT-wingers are intelligent enough to know that everyone is ultimately a self-serving bastard, according to new research.

THIS year's snow is the same as last year's, it has been confirmed.

MARINE biologists from Scotland have discovered, deep-fried and eaten the world's biggest prawn.

CLAIMS surrounding James Murdoch's missing emails have prompted IT staff to deny they would ever assist a colleague with anything, ever.

SALLY Morgan is to sue the Daily Mail with a legal team including Abraham Lincoln, Clarence Darrow and someone who claims to be John Mortimer.

TUBE travellers will be able to broadcast their ignorance even when 150 foot underground by summer, promise TFL.

PAUL Daniels is to explain to the Magic Circle why he did not use conjuring and sorcery to re-attach his severed finger.

THE availability of one-piece romper suits for adult males proves that men are over, it has been claimed.

ONLY private money should pissed away on the Queen's new boat, the government has insisted.