Science & Technology

EXTRA-TERRESTRIALS have as little enthusiasm for coming to Earth as we do for visiting elderly relatives, it has been claimed.

THE Brendan Fraser film Journey to the Center of the Earth depicts real events, it has been confirmed.

THE inventor of the internet has said that it must remain free of government interference and have more videos with bulldogs in.

HUMAN brains are inefficient sacks of jelly regardless of gender, according to new research.

GIANT lizards from prehistory were just made up to sell toys and books, scientists have admitted.

STONEHENGE was a set of primitive percussion instruments used to keep kids busy on rainy days, it has emerged.

AN ANCIENT virus found beneath the Siberian permafrost cannot infect and control humans, according to scientists with odd monotone voices.

THE Northern Lights are a sign that God approves of gay marriage, according to pro-European Christians.

THE new Samsung smartphone kicks off if you stare at it.

A TEACHER has proved what an imbecile he is by attempting to demonstrate how quickly messages spread on social media.