A WOMAN who thinks the world revolves around her was selfishly expecting her date to find out something about her life.
Narcissist Nikki Hollis believed Martin Bishop would abandon a perfectly interesting monologue about an IT upgrade at his workplace in favour of a boring Q&A session about her unimportant existence.
Bishop said: “Conversation is a two-way street. I tell her something, then it’s Nikki’s turn to look at me raptly, nodding in agreement as I move onto another thing about myself I want to say.
“Instead I caught her briefly not smiling, and at one point looking around the restaurant in the middle of a fascinating explanation of data packets. It was downright rude.
“Why bother arranging a date if she’s not interested in finding out about my job, car, flat, ISAs, washing machine, phone contract, qualifications, childhood and difficulty finding trousers with a 44” waist that don’t have ridiculously long legs?
“Anyway I did ask her a question. I asked her if we were going back to mine or her place for sex. Obviously ‘f**k off’ was not the answer I’d hoped for, but I feel I did my bit to be interested in her.”
In a rare break from thinking about herself, Hollis said: “It’s true. On my next date I’ll probably silently wish my potential partner would shut the f**k up about cycling for five minutes. It’s just the sort of unbearably self-centred bitch I am.”
