Lifestyle

Man accepts he is bald ten years after everyone else did

A MAN has finally come to terms with the fact he has no hair, a decade after his friends and family did the same.

A TV on the floor, and other signs you're visiting a tragic man-boy house

THE state of a man’s home will instantly reveal if he has an inner adolescence he never grew out of. Look for these warning signs.

Disney nail polish set regifted to eighth child in same class

A FROZEN-branded nail polish set is to be re-gifted for the eighth time within the same class of 24 primary school pupils, it has emerged.

Why you don't want to be connected to the South anyway: A guide for Northerners

HIGH Speed 2 may never happen, but is that as bad as it sounds? Here’s why Northerners should be grateful not to be connected to the South.

Patriarchy collapses after teenage boy paints nails

THE social system which benefits men has come crashing down as a 15-year-old boy has decided to lacquer his nails with coloured varnish.

Nine things we wish you would stop doing, by a newborn

AS a newborn baby, there are many things you do that make me wish I was able to tell you you're an idiot. Like these.

Boomer couple downsizing to bigger house than you will ever own

A RETIRED couple have moved from their spacious five-bed family home to a modest little three-bed that is still far beyond your buying power.

New mum spends first night out hopelessly pissed and irrationally paranoid

A NEW mum who had been desperate to go out for months immediately got hammered and spent the whole evening fretting about her baby.

Man who says weed doesn't affect him oddly refusing to prove it

A MAN who is impervious to marijuana is strangely reluctant to give it another go.

Five surprising benefits of being an unlikeable twat

EVERYONE hates a disagreeable arsehole, but it’s far from all bad. These are the surprising benefits people rarely discuss.