Lifestyle

TATTOOS are great and nobody ever regrets them, so why not get one done where everyone can see it? Good idea? Bad idea?

A MAN has organised a Straight Pride festival that reflects his heterosexual values by putting on a barbecue in a corner of Homebase car park.

A COUPLE'S online wedding list has got to be taking the piss, it has been confirmed.

MICHAEL Gove is absolutely mental for gak, the white stuff, ching and nose crack, he has confessed. 

A MAN who has had a tough week is urgently searching for something he can buy himself to cheer himself up.

THOUSANDS are self-styled 'foodies' are trumpeting their ability to orally process nutrients, it has emerged.

A COUPLE have relocated to a smaller house to be in the catchment area of an outstanding Waitrose, they have confirmed.

A FAMILY who bought a tent to save money have been forced to blow their life savings on all the fucking equipment you need to go with it.

YOUR body might be telling you it urgently needs to go to the bathroom, but sometimes it’s just too much hassle. Here’s how to put it off like the lazy bastard you are.  

A SPIDER plant is fed up of spending its life in a damp room where people go to the bog.