THE car you drive says a lot about you, if you’re one of those people who consider their car to be a core component of their self-image. But are you one of those people? Find out:
LEXUS IS 250
The Lexus driver has the confidence to spend big, a leaning toward luxury and a willingness to experiment with less traditional marques. If you’re into cars, that is. Otherwise it’s just a big car.
MINI COUNTRYMAN
A witty, innovative take on a classic, three qualities which drivers imagine reflect those same qualities in themselves. To everyone else it’s a extra-large version of a car defined by being small, which is stupid.
AUDI S4
These motorists admire the Germans and their characteristic efficiency right up to the point of claiming that whatever else you might say about him Hitler was a military genius up to at least 1942. Arouses in others a mild dislike which is soon justified.
RANGE ROVER
Size, aggression, off-road ruggedness and being a Premier League footballer but a sensible one, a defender, perhaps Kyle Walker. These are the qualities drivers of Range Rovers are convinced their cars convey. All others wonder why you would need one if you are not a farmer.
KIA PICANTO
To car people this is unforgivably Korean, painfully unoriginal, shamefully reliable and if you were on a low budget, why not go for something vintage? To its owners, who don’t give a fuck about any of that, it is just their car.