AN OPPORTUNISTIC wedding planner is earning up to £2,400 per wedding for providing couples with a bespoke day identical to every other one.
After spending years observing the slick, characterless weddings of all her friends, Susan Traherne ditched her job in marketing for a well-paid position as an unnecessary middleman for lowest common denominator events instead.
She said: “I’ve tried offering them a unique individual experience. By and large they were disappointed.
“So when clients say they don’t want candles in jam jars or a large Mr & Mrs sign in gold curly handwriting, I show them photos of every other wedding I’ve done and that changes their minds.
“If they start getting ideas I say ‘we need to be realistic about budgets’ and that shuts them up. What guests want is everything they’ve come to expect, from balloon arch to sweet cart, and if they need an out-there surprise how about a dog as a ring bearer?
“Anything more original than a photo booth takes up valuable space where the post-dance picnic benches go to distract everyone from it being a Bracknell Travelodge function room. I tell them just to play it safe. That’s what I’m paid for.”
Bride Lucy Parry said: “I wanted everything to look really boring so I received all the attention. The planner’s eye for beige made everything go off perfectly.”
