International

GORDON Brown has pledged to save Britain with an exciting timetable of parliamentary debates.

SNP leader Alex Salmond has admitted he has never been entirely sure what he means when he says ‘independence’.

WELSH schoolchildren yesterday told President Obama that ‘nato’ means ‘herpes’ in their native language.

WESTERN governments are taking too long to come up with an ill-thought out response to ISIS, it has been claimed.

FOLLOWING the deaths of the geckos on its satellite, Russia is to send more unappealing species on one-way space journeys.

AUSTRALIA has said it is willing to join bombing missions in Iraq, or anywhere else, because it loves a good fight.

A 21 year-old woman has managed to link every event of the last week to her backpacking trip to Thailand.

WIKILEAKS founder Julian Assange has told reporters at the Ecuadorian embassy that he is unchained like Django and to call him maybe.

A 12-foot Burmese python blamed for cat disappearances has been hailed as a hero by mice and rabbits.

SCOTLAND has welcomed a letter urging the country to reject independence, signed by a collection of fancy English celebrities.