US tariffs have triggered a catastrophic increase in the number of condescending men explaining what they are, economists have warned.
Millions of women have reported being subjected to unsolicited lectures from male co-workers, friends and partners who are now economic experts after watching a three-minute YouTube video.
Meanwhile the Bank of England has estimated that mansplains are currently at three times their 2024 level – the largest increase in mansplaining since the release of the 2014 film Interstellar.
Kelly Howard of Daventree said: “There’s no escaping it. Today Steve at work gave me an incorrect explanation of reciprocal tariffs, and when I got home my boyfriend had turned into Gary f**king Stevenson without the wide-boy charm or money.
“I’ve also endured smug conversations about how people misunderstand trade deficits and a highly questionable analysis of China’s next move. I’m starting to think IMF might stand for Insufferable Mansplaining F**kwit.
“I’d quite like a tariff on the words that men export from their mouths into my ears. Call me a protectionist, but I need to stop my own thoughts being swamped by ill-informed bollocks.”
Economists say a further increase in phrases like ‘Let me break it down for you’ and ‘It’s basic economics when you think about it’ could overwhelm female patience by the end of the week.
Many women are now threatening retaliatory measures, including sarcastic nodding and saying ‘Shut up, Milton Friedman’, with one women’s group launching an awareness campaign titled ‘Thanks, I Have Google’.
