Health

A UNIVERSITY student has returned home for Christmas with an alternative and radical strain of the coronavirus, he has confirmed.

IDIOTS have been warned that merely ordering a vaccine does not make them immediately immune to Covid.

THE health secretary has confirmed that regions will only be able to move to a new coronavirus tier after a series of play-offs.

GREY days and long nights making you blue? You might be suffering from SAD, or this might just be the worst f**king winter of any of our lives.

HAVE you formed a bubble with a friend but now want to switch bubbles to a different, better friend? Break the news gently.

THE county of Kent has informed Boris Johnson that he has aroused its wrath and must therefore relinquish his position.

ARE you a grown adult but think scientists are just trying to spoil everyone’s fun for the hell of it? Here’s how to behave like a petulant toddler.

JOSEPH is not looking forward to telling three wise men from the East that with the shepherds and the angels they already have a three-bubble gathering.

EVERY region of England is convinced that they will be going straight from lockdown into the freedom of Tier 1, it has emerged.

THE shortlist for the 2020 Covid Superspreader of the Year awards has been released, with Dominic Cummings the clear favourite to win.