A DOCTOR’S receptionist takes every single patient who successfully manages to see a doctor as a painful personal defeat, she has admitted.
Mary Fisher, the receptionist of a practice in Didcot, had no option but to let five patients through yesterday, and is ashamed of how badly she let herself down.
She said: “They’re not ill, none of them. Bad moral fibre is the problem.
“I’ve got a very good record on the phone – 322 calls, no appointments – but sometimes when they come in all pale and close to death I’m weak enough to let one slip past me.
“It’s dereliction of duty. The doctor’s very busy doing doctor things and I’ve got no business allowing these intrusions on her time.
“But then there was that one time I called the man’s bluff and, well, an ambulance got called and he was admitted to hospital. And died. I still say he was putting it on.”
Doctor Helen Archer said: “I don’t know what all this is about NHS workloads. I never see anyone.”