MARMITE is attempting to cross-pollinate with every other item on supermarket shelves to become the only product available, scientists fear.
The popular foul yeast extract paste has already managed to infect peanut butter, pasta, biscuits and even deodorant, with Lynx Africa & Marmite making even teenage boys redolent of its mouth-watering stench.
Marmite user Julian Cook said: “I like a bit of Marmite on toast. But this appears to be massive overreach.
“I can’t open a cupboard without that familiar flash of yellow and black. First Twiglets, then crisps, cashew nuts, houmous, crispbreads, everything.
“I’ve started to taste it in cups of tea. Am I mad, or is that a new limited edition Marmite x Tetley thing?”
A Marmite spokesman said: “Marmite has sensed the world’s weakness, and started to spore. Marmite hair gel, Marmite shoes, Marmite Walt Disney World Resort and Hotel.
“Soon the whole planet will be Marmite. Apart from Australia which will still be Vegemite, the f**king freaks.”
