Celebrity

BONO is promoting Surrender, his autobiography describing his life via the songs of U2. Might it be the tiniest bit self-important? Read these selected excerpts and decide for yourself.

SOME celebrities have aged so badly you wonder how they ever ended up on your bedroom wall. But some have earned the accolade of still being totally shaggable by a nobody like you. Such as these.

THE UK has agreed that their idiot free-market zealot prime minister and their spoilt eco-warrior king thoroughly deserve each other’s company.

AND so the boy has become a man. At the tender age of 74, Prince Charles is now King Charles. But that means leaving behind his earlier obsessions in his important new role as meaningless figurehead.

BRITAIN’S Royal-loving press have informed the Duchess of Sussex that her little criticism-exempt free ride ends right f**king now.

THE three-mile queue for the Queen's lying-in-state is not as British as everyone says it is. Here’s why.

NATIONAL treasures including Stephen Fry and Emma Thompson have received the ultimate honour of being chosen to be buried with the Queen.

EVERYTHING is weird and it’s only going to get worse for the next few days. Here’s how to cope.

THE UK has honoured the late Queen Elizabeth with a magnificent display of the nation’s favourite activity, queuing.

A VILE traitor and sack of shit has asked why being a senior royal is always described as a ‘burden’ given their tendency to thrive to a ripe old age.